Different kinds of friendships always comes to mind after being on a social network. There are fair-weather friends, casual acquaintances, lost friends, found friends, new friends, and friends who we hope to never meet again. For those we want to contact, we reach out and touch someone with a smiley face or a nice comment about something they posted, or a picture they shared. It's often construed as impersonal and lacks the emotional and physical response we as humans need. Then it occurred to me about an epidemic that faces the world and it's called skin hunger. It's an emotional response that is developed by the lack of touch. Sometimes, it can even cause you to feel depressed and completely alone as you swim in an ocean of peoples who barely know you. How wonderful it would be to jump into the car and visit a family member or meet a friend for a lunch or dinner date but instead, we have to be content with faraway impersonal relationships. The heartfelt hugs we once remembered are being diminished as more families and friends live apart in different states and this lack of touch keeps us from being close to our loved ones. When was the last time you reached out and touched someone? For me, it is not nearly often enough. When was the last time someone said, “If only you lived closer...” or “We can't be truly a part of your life when you live so far away?”
I am truly affected after leaving someone I care for when there's been physical contact, because I am a hugger and I have the need to look into someones eyes during conversation. I want to remember how the lines formed around someone's eyes when they smiled and the touch of their hand on mine. Don't get me wrong, I am thankful for technology as it has allowed us to communicate with anyone around the world, but unfortunately it dehumanizes the physical interaction for which many of us crave and thrive upon. We interact with our electronic devices more than we do with each other, completely eliminating the human touch from the equation. Sadly, many our our older generation do not use technological devices, and can leave them feeling unloved and out of the loop with others. How many times have you see a family gathering and everyone is texting, or surfing the web while grandma sits alone? How many times have you got together with the grandkids and they would prefer to text their friends or check out a You Tube video? How many times have you wanted to reach out and hug a young person without them thinking you're a pervert?
We live disconnected lifestyles and we live in an extremely litigious society where touching someone can be considered sexual harassment. People have become fearful of hugging and physically greeting one another. Can you imagine a child being born into a strange world with underdeveloped senses except for the sense of touch? We have all initially made sense of this world through our skins. Touch and affection told us the world is a safe, secure and warm place to live. Touch comforted us. A pat on the back, a squeeze of the hand, a massage or a gentle hug can heal the heart and spiritual well-being in the receiver. For those of us who may be suffering from skin hunger, a therapeutic massage may satisfy the cravings. For a parent, a spouse, a friend, or a caregiver do not forgo such a human and elemental need as touch. It makes lasting memories once a loved one is gone.
It is the first sense developed in the womb and the last sense to leave our bodies. It is so vital, in fact, that therapist and author Virginia Satir stated that human beings need four hugs a day for survival, eight hugs a day for maintenance and 12 hugs a day for growth. So find someone you love or care about and give them a hug today. You'll be surprised how many will say, “I needed that.”
